Grandma: What's this money doing here?
Me: Granddad gave it to you when you complained that he had money and you didn't.
Grandma: I'll have to do that more often. Here, I'll hide it and say he never gave me nothin'! [Sticks the folded up bill in her bra]
Me: Great. Now it'll look like you moonlight as a stripper.
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(In response to hearing about my gym routine)
Grandma: What do women need to worry about muscles for??
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Granddad: I attended more school board meetings than the members
did. Fought them tooth and nail. [Musing] I wasn't well-liked.
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Grandma: I'm not violent. I've never been violent. I don't even know how to SPELL violence.
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Granddad: Here, I want to argue with you. What do you think about this abortion stuff in the news?
Me: [Thinking I've found a way to avoid this] I don't know. I have absolutely no opinion. What do you think about it?
[Thirty minutes later]
Me: I agree that the Catholic church has gotten political and it's not the job of churches to be political. But this is a moral matter, to them, so they do have validity to make a stand.
Granddad: But it's legal. It's the law. That makes it politics and religion shouldn't have anything to do with politics.
Me: So you're saying that, if I am a church and you makes a legal ruling on a moral matter, I'm not allowed to say anything? That the issues changes from moral to legal just because you say it does?
Granddad: You need to study politics and the law. We can't really carry on a conversation this way.
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